2 Tim 1:7

 

I am veering off patience this morning to share a Christine Caine post.  I am sharing this for someone specific who needs to hear it.

This has been a hard morning, following a hard night.

Last night at 11:30 pm, my son left to head back home to Missouri and the USAF.

Josh had not been home in almost two years, and this visit - although a short five days - was better than any of us could have imagined.

Josh has grown and matured and is a natural talker (much like his Father).  My heart broke (as I knew it would) when I walked back into a quiet and empty house.

There are seven more days left of Winter Break.  I will need to fill them with activities, home projects, and more to help keep my Spirit and countenance full.

I knew that Josh's leaving on top of my feelings for David would be a hard combination to work through.  Two pieces of my heart missing. And so, I wasn't surprised when my body would wake up at 4:30 and then 6:30 and then again at 7:30.  I am drained and tired.

I need to get back to walking, yoga, and so much more.

I wasn't surprised when I tried to pray and talk to God and I kept falling asleep.  I wasn't surprised when I finally broke down and gave in to the tears at 8:30, kneeling by the couch to pray and cry out to God - for myself, for my boys, and for David.

So many feelings.  So many people needing intercession and prayer.  Protection and guidance...

Finally wiping the tears away and pouring the day's first cup of coffee, I opened up my Christine Caine book and read what I am going to share below.

I needed to read this.  God needed to speak to my SOUL.  But also - while reading it, all it kept bringing to mind was David.

I pray that although David has blocked me everywhere, he still remembers this blog and comes to read it from time to time.  This post is for him.  This Bible verse is for him.

The devotion below may be for you as well if you are reading this and struggling today.  I'm not sure who else God may be using this writing for...

I know who I am posting it for and who was brought to mind over and over again as I read.  Yes, some of it was applicable to myself - but my prayer is that David stumbles upon this post at some point in his life and it touches his heart and Spirit as it did mine.

God has a process and a plan in place.  We can't always see it until we have passed it and reached our destination.  I don't know where I'm traveling to today.  I'm just praying I make it through the hours of the day.  As one of my prayer partners told me yesterday, "Debbie, you are going to live whether you want to or not! You will get through this and come out on the other side even better than before!  Embrace this time with the Lord."  Amen.

2 Timothy 1:7

God has not given you a Spirit of FEAR, but one of POWER, LOVE, and SOUND JUDGMENT.

When the Covid-19 pandemic first started, I remember going to the store one day and being shocked at the empty shelves. I remember overhearing conversations as I waited in the long line at the checkout. While some people had much to say and others very little, what couldn't be missed was the fear in their voices.

On my drive home, I couldn't help but think about it, and when I did, that, same spirit of fear began to invade my mind. I thought of my girls and how all this could affect them. They'd already been sent home from school to learn online. They'd already been separated from their friends and routines. We were all adapting to a whole new way of life minute by minute.

As I pulled into the driveway, deep down, I knew I couldn't go in the house in such a state. I had to stop and rein it all in. For Nick. For the girls. For my own piece of mine. So, doing what I had done a thousand times before, I put my hand to my forehead, and I started talking too myself: "Christine, God has not given you a spirit of fear but of LOVE, POWER, and a SOUND MIND. You might not understand what is happening, but the one thing you know is that God has never failed you before, and he is not about to start now, so you know you can trust him now."

I understand you might think this is a strange ritual, but it is a practice I have developed over the years. When I have a decision to make. When I need answers in a tough situation. When my thoughts begin to spiral, my heart starts to race, and my palms go damp. When everything feels out of my control, and fear wants to take complete control. When I need to endure in faith.

In every battle we face, are fiercest enemy is fear, and the devil knows it. That's why he's always ready to foster it and reinforce it. If we don't learn how to overcome its power, then it can defeat us every time. It can even develop into chronic conditions that manifest in our bodies and minds, such as anxiety, panic attacks, incessant worry, or sleepless nights. If you have ever suffered from any of fear's debilitating effects, you know that the symptoms are very real.

But God has not given us a spirit of fear. He has given us POWER, LOVE, and SOUND JUDGMENT. The Bible translation I first memorized calls it a sound mind, which is why I quoted it that way to myself. I do my best to use God's Word to defeat fear where the battle always begins - in my mind.

What about you? Have you learned to fight the battle in your mind and for your mind? Have you learned to wield God's Word against the fear that tries to take over? Today's verse is a strong declaration to remind yourself that God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of POWER, LOVE, and a SOUND MIND.

Heavenly Father, thank you that you have not given me a spirit of fear but of power, love, and a sound mind. Help me remember this and keep trusting in You more in Jesus name, Amen.

*The above is quoted from Christine Caine's newest devotion book, You're Not Finished Yet.  Below is my Amazon Associate link, if you would like to order.  I love reading Christine Caine.  She is always right on time, Biblically-centered and accurate, and a great inspiration to all of our Spiritual walks and growth.

Fear or Faith

 

Fear or faith?

Today, I found out some news about a coworker of mine.  A person I've known quite a while.

She's leaving.  She's leaving our school and "us."  Heading to her son's school to wind down her teaching career being closer to him as he moves closer to his graduation years.

She's young.  She's vibrantly healthy.  She has a great life.  She will be 52 when she retires.

This move made several of us look at our own lives, and while we were extremely happy for her, we all felt less than.

Not healthy enough.  Didn't go to college or college early enough.  Didn't pick the right degree in college.  Aren't making six figures.  Aren't close to retirement.  We felt less than.

I looked at my own life.  Didn't move off to college.  Helped a Parent.  Stayed at home.  Got a two-year degree and had to quit college before a four-year degree could be achieved due to that Parent's lifestyle. Got married.  Got divorced.  Making five figures (a mediocre five figures).  Struggling to pay bills.  Trying to be good at other things.  But always feeling a little less than.

A coworker today said to me, "I can go down a black rabbit hole looking and thinking about this, so I'm choosing to say I made my choices in the past and I wouldn't go back and change them."

A lot of emotions at work today.

A few minutes ago, I sort of forced myself to open up my devotions and read.  I can feel the crying looming in the back of my eyes and my throat.  "I'll be working forever."  "I'm going to lose all my savings." "I'm going to always be less than."

So many decisions life threw me, and here I am today.  Less than.

So to have Ben Stuart speak to me tonight was a God thing I think.  This devotional was written for students, but I love Ben so I am going through his thoughts and writings for a season.  A few minutes ago, I read about Faith and Fear.  I think this about sums up my day and life in general:

One of the most common commands in all of Scripture is “do not fear.” Left to its own, this isn’t an incredibly helpful statement. However, where this statement is found, so is the One who says it. How can we live a life without fear? By finishing the verse. “For you are with me.” Underneath this mask of fear is self-dependence. It’s the opposite of faith in Jesus. Fear sees a problem and looks to self for the solution. Faith sees a problem and runs to the Lord as the strong tower of defense. Fear sees a problem and looks inward. Faith sees a problem and looks upward. 

Did you catch that?

"Underneath this mask of FEAR is SELF-DEPENDENCE."  I had to read that twice.  Under my mask of FEAR is SELF-dependence.  Wow.

"Fear sees a problem and looks to self for the solution."  Yep.  That is preaching some truth right there.

I have so many fears, and I am always trying to learn and better myself to fix my problems.  But what I forget is this:

"Faith sees a problem and RUNS TO THE LORD as the strong tower of defense.  Fear...looks inward.  Faith...looks upward."

I need to remember these words, "There is a Shepherd who walks with you. Don’t be afraid."

I really, really, really need to commit these words to memory.

To be honest, I feel like an island most of the time.  I am around friends and they don't seem to have the interest or depth of interest I have in faith and living a certain way or learning more or honoring certain things.  I am around family members who check off Sundays at church on their checklist and never open a Bible during the week or think about living the way the Bible tells us to or applying Scripture to their lives.

I just feel alone and like an island most of the time.

So, Ben's words tonight are a little bit of encouragement to me.  Just remember the Shepherd who is walking with me and try not to be afraid.

I'm not really sure how to wrap up this journal entry.  I'm a bag of mixed emotions tonight.  Alone.  Less than.  But yet - I really do understand that Jesus is walking with me.  I am off to think and pray some more before bed, and maybe somewhere within that time frame, Jesus will take the fears and feelings of inadequacies off my shoulders.

If you are also struggling with getting older and feeling less than, remember these words from Ephesians 3:19, "and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."

We are going to make it.  We just need to keep the faith and remember who is walking with us...

May your evening be full of peace and rest...

Levi Lusko: The Nearest Lion

 

Good morning friends.  Such a great devotion from Levi Lusko this morning in, "take back your life."  (Seriously, if you don't have this devotional yet, make sure you run and get it!  Anything from Levi is so good!)

Today, Levi talks about facing your fears and how sometimes running AWAY from something scary can actually be a bad thing and keep you from something wonderful God has in store for you.  Listen to what he says,

"...you must not let fear play a part in your decision-making.  You can't ignore fear, but you can't let it control you.  True bravery isn't feeling no fear.  It's being afraid and moving forward anyway.

...running toward the roar can be excruciating, and there are no guarantees.  When you live a life of faith, there are going to be questions that have no answers, because for there to be faith, there has to be mystery.  That's just life in the deep end.  Nothing ventured, nothing gained."

Keep Levi's prayer in mind as you go through today and face your daily fears,

"Father, I declare today that my heart will not fear, and even in the face of it, I will rise up in confidence.  Turning back feels easier, but I'm believing that charging forward in your strength will lead me to my destiny.  Amen." 

I love that.  I am committing to moving forward in the face of fear to make life better and to see what God has in store.  What about you?

Leave us a comment below telling us how you are going to face your fears and see what God has in store for you!  I can't wait to hear your stories!

Happy Monday!

 

Widsom: Chip Gaines

Good Tuesday morning friends.

I finished Chip's book this morning during my morning basement bike ride.  I really encourage each of you to purchase this book and read it.

It is a great motivator to get outside of yourself, set goals, and act on them.  A great book on how to live a good life and from a good standpoint.

I'm sure I don't need to tell you Chip's resume.  Most of us are already familiar with Chip and his wife Joanna and their cultural phenomenon Magnolia - a small idea they dreamed up together early in their relationship.

What I do want to share with you is one of the last things Chip said in his book.  Last page, last chapter:

"I believe each one of you still has important things to do, or you wouldn't still be here on this earth.  Hear me now:  if you are able to read this book, you are able to change the world.  It might be through small, every day choices but those initial sparks can set the whole world on fire.

As for me, all I've ever wanted, when you get right down to it, is to change the world.  I don't literally mean the whole world.  That would be nice, I guess, but what I really care about is changing the world around me.  This means pouring into the lives of my wife and my kids, my employees, my friends, and my acquaintances.  That's the ripple effect I've always hoped to put into motion.

Rather than taking the easy way out, I learned to trust myself.

That voice we hear when we're thinking about going out on a limb - tune into it.

There's the one thing I want to leave with you:  trusting your gut is the first step.  Although that first step won't be enough to get you across the finish line, it's definitely the hardest - and the most important - of every single one that follows."

So, here's what I leave you with to ponder this morning and throughout your day.  As you drive to work, as you (maybe) sit in your cubile.  As you drive to Target.  As you drive to the grocery store.  As you drive home.

What motivates you?  What lights a fire in you?  Don't let fear win.  Be passionate about the gifts and talents you've been given.  Gifts are meant to be shared.  Go out and make a difference today!

Ecclesiastes 3: What do workers gain from their toll?  I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race.  He has made everything beautiful in its time.  He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God had done from beginning to end.  I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live.  That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil - this is the gift of God."

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